I was inspired by the Sean Avery and Paul Bissonnette incidents to run a Top 10 list of NHL personalities that I feel should have Twitter, but don’t. Now, the last time I checked, I was still in Korea. Wait…let me look again. Yup. There is a distinct fishy squid smell out on the street. So, it is very likely that one or more of the people on this list have made Twitter accounts, and I was just unaware due to that fact that most of you in NHL land tweet while I’m asleep. Please let me know if they do, so I can add them to my Twitter list of NHL Pimps. Enjoy!
10. Mark Messier
Chip? In theory Messier would be a very colourful addition to Twitter, but I fear that the Moose is too much of an iconic figure not to be severely disciplined by the muzzle of NHL censorship. But on the other hand…Twitter, bet you can’t tweet just once!
9. Maxim Lapierre & Antoine Vermette
Purely cosmetic additions to the Twitter world. These two would unlikely do a great service to the hockey “tweep” community unless they were to get a little trigger happy with the TweetPhoto application. Gots ta love those French-Canadian mens.
8. Ray Ferraro
With on air statements about sticking fingers in dykes, Ray Ferraro is quickly becoming the new generation of Pierre McGuire-esque colour commentators. One can only assume he’d be able to deliver similar gems in 140 characters or less.
7. Don Cherry
I can see it all now, Don Cherry’s online Twitter hockey tutorial for the kids at home! 140 characters, no 5 second time delay.
6. Jeremy Roenick
Jeremy Roenick has one of the biggest personalities in the hockey community, so one can only hope that he’d bring his presence to the Twitter realm. However, I think JR might fall under the same hypothetical influence as Mark Messier.
5. Scott Hartnell
Scott Hartnell always knows just what to say whether he’s at the breakfast table, or warming up for a game. It’s a guarantee that his Twitter feed would be non-stop hilarious, so long as he doesn’t fall into the game day tweet pattern as so many nondescript NHL accounts before him.
4. Pierre McGuire
Yes, I am aware that there was a fake Pierre McGuire Twitter account, and there is even a hilarious @ShitMcGuireSays feed as well, but one can only assume that the imposters wouldn’t have shit on the real deal.
3. Bobby Ryan & Ryan Getzlaf
I mean, come on, have you seen this?!
2. Paul Bissonnette
Bissonnette was strong-armed into deactivating his insanely popular Twitter account @paulbiznasty, and his fans are still devastated by the loss. @paulbiznasty gave fans an insight into what an NHL player REALLY does on a day to day basis without all the sugarcoated BS we are fed from the other NHL accounts. We can only hope that he’ll be up and running again soon. Since his deactivation, Bissonnette has mounted a Twitter inspired campaign to raise money for a homeless shelter in Phoenix. Click here to buy one of his saucy T-shirts!
1. Sean Avery
As I mentioned before, if one NHL player NEEDED to be on Twitter, it’s Sean Avery. And I’m not referring to the entertainment of the fans online either, Avery gave up his best promotional tool when he shut down his account. Therefore, I decided to keep his account warm for him, and resurrected @seanaveryd0tcom. I do not pretend to be Sean Avery, but instead try to provide the public with tweets of his quality. Follow me! I have big things planned *grins.* More to come on this later. P.S. No, I’m not a Sean Avery super fan!
