Hours and hours and hours later, I pulled into Kingston. The traffic all the way down the 401 was brutal, and I have absolutely no idea why! I think there was some severe rubbernecking going on. Unfortunately for the patrons of the K-Rock Centre that night, namely the quiet old man sitting next to me who yelled, “Shit” periodically throughout the game, I didn’t have any time to get cleaned up before heading to the rink as you can tell from my game day shot. Sorry!

The temperature was well into the negative that night, and Kingston had turned into a virtual skating rink. I had to glide all the way to the arena at the pace of a speed skater to avoid losing some of my extremities to the cold. I sought shelter in the first deserted entrance I saw to wait for the gates to open. An usher with a strangely familiar face was pacing around the doorway. I couldn’t shake the fact that I knew him from somewhere. Finally, after racking my brain for the 15 minutes prior to the doors opening, I handed him my ticket and asked, “You didn’t happen to work for Maple Leaf Sports, did you?” Sure enough he WAS one of my old work colleagues from waaaay back in my MLSE days. We weren’t in the same department, and he had facial hair now, which explains why I struggled to place him with confidence at first.

Yeah… Pick up those pucks!

We spent the entirety of the second period shooting the shit, which was fine because neither the Frontenacs nor the Generals scored a single goal in the period, so I didn’t miss anything other than some young boys skating around with a dangerous amount of facial hair for their own good. Anyway, he told me several interesting legends from his time working with the Leafs. Back during the 2003 playoffs he set the ice at the Air Canada Centre with two lucky pennies. One penny was dated 1967 and the other was 2003. He hid each penny under the goal posts in the Leafs zone. For each of the three games hosted in Toronto, NO ONE scored on that net. Now that’s not to say Toronto was never scored upon, just that no one was able to score on that end of the ice. Unfortunately, management found out about the pennies, and made him take them out. He also noted that since he stopped doing the ice at the Air Canada Centre, the Leafs haven’t made the postseason. Interesting… and here’s hoping that his curse is finally lifted this year!

While we were swapping stories, the Fronts mascot, Henry, interrupted us by rubbing my back in a manner that can only be described as somewhere in the realm of post-coital sensuality. I have quite the storied history with mascots doing bizarre things to me. Most notably Griff in Grand Rapids (AHL). He used to attack me ALL the time; every time I went to Van Andel Arena, or if he showed up at another rink that I was also at. He’d always BITE me, or just lurk in my general vicinity with his menacing presence. Then there was Tex in KItchener (OHL) who was most famous for messing up my hair, and that damn Phlex in Philadelphia (AHL) who thought he was better than me! Actually, the most disturbing mascot of all wasn’t even a hockey mascot. Back during one of the Halloween Haunts at Canada’s Wonderland, one of the monsters kept following me around saying, “Yeaaahhh, let’s make a baby.” What I found most uncomfortable about that whole incident, as well as with my Henry encounter, was that the mascot was shorter than me. I don’t know. There’s just something severely off-putting about shortness in mascots.

Despite a loss for the home team, and the fact that the arena poutine made me feel sick (don’t freak out or anything. I think the problem was not the poutine itself, but rather the fact that I crushed not one, but TWO A&W Papa Burgers prior to the game…don’t judge me!), it was an overall great experience to finally get down to the “controversial” K-Rock Centre. Kingston has been #1 on my OHL hit list for a couple seasons now, so it’s a great feeling to finally add this one to my repertoire of episodes of hockey related insanity. Sadly, according to the people of Kingston, the K-Rock Centre raised a lot of eyebrows when it was being built – something to do with the fact that the mayor owns the land that it’s built on. Anyway, the bottom line is that a lot of hockey fans in Kingston refused to support the Fronts as a means of protest against the whole scandal. Hmm makes me wonder if the 67’s and Bulls had a spike in ticket sales since the new rink was built. You really have to feel for the kids in all of this, though. It must be tough to play in front of an empty barn at such and impressionable (and vulnerable) age.

And now I leave you with a rare photo of former Frontenac, Mike Zigomanis, with his pants ON! Sean Avery is also pictured.

Back in the day, I had this notion that there was a heavy puck bunny scene down in Ottawa, and the locals, who were around during this reign of terror, confirmed that I wasn’t off in my assumptions. Back then I had based this idea on those puck bunny rumour sites that I mentioned a few weeks ago. Not only was there a lot of activity coming directly from the puck bunny sites dedicated to the 67’s, but there was a lot of inquiries made about gals spotted rink side on the players’ moderated sites as well. If players from around the O were so intrigued by the puck bunny caliber in Ottawa that they had to find out who these girls were at all costs, then obviously these O-Town bunnies were, at one time, a force to be reckoned with. This high puck quality suggests a higher puck quantity as well…you know…seeing as most hockey players will attempt to nail practically anything that moves. Anyway…

However, the old days appeared to be long gone (once again) as I walked into yet another OHL rink with a virtually extinct puck bunny population. Aside from the odd cluster here and there, and rumours that some of the ice girls were partial to hanging around the locker rooms a little longer than they should, there was almost no sign that these girls ever existed. Since the game against the Erie Otters and the trip itself were so uneventful (the highlights being running into the team bus after I finished pumping gas in Brockville, and discovering that the Urbandale Centre had its very own BeaverTails stand), I had more than enough time to reexamine some of my going theories about the disappearance of the puck bunny.

To begin the brainstorming process, I had to take a trip back in time to my teen years, and start identifying some of the things that have changed socially since this golden era when the puck bunny reigned supreme from their junior hockey rink thrones across the country. The easiest thing to identify was the physical change; teen girls today look a lot different from the teens roaming this side of the planet less than ten years ago. Girls are aging (aesthetically) at a faster pace, for starters. You can blame the trendsetters in Hollywood for trying to convince the world that we’re unhealthy if we don’t have skin damage from the sun. And let’s not forget that fake is in: fake tans, fake boobs, fake nails, fake hair, fake personality; women today are starting to look like a page aggressively ripped from the binding of the latest Us Weekly – the SAME page no less.

Naturally, this started to make me question to state of desire, and what was now considered desirable to the young, contemporary female who subscribed to these ideals. My major jumping off point was the designer handbag, sunglasses, and pretty much everything uprising. See, about fifteen years ago (I’d say), lower end designers came on in full force with that whole “brand name” rage that swept the impressionable youth of its day. You remember when brands like Calvin Klein, Tommy Hilfiger, etc started becoming the it-designers for the middle class for the simple reason that they started splashing their name across the chest of every shirt they shipped to the department store nearest you. This began the designer obsession on the sole basis that now other people would be able to know how much you could afford to spend on material things, and how well you dressed just by simply reading the logo stamped in bold on the clothing item itself. Now, I’m not saying people never cared about fashion before that, but labels had never really been seen on the outside of a dress or a shirt, or, or, or before. Let’s just say keeping up appearances suddenly got a whole lot easier.

It took the upscale designers a surprisingly long time to get on board with this concept. Well, I shouldn’t say “surprisingly,” I’m sure the upper crust was not about to start begging for mass consumption as the likes of Tommy and Calvin were so eager to do. So, it wasn’t until I was in university, and long estranged from the junior hockey realm that the designer handbag fever swept the western world. What a brilliant idea. High end designers like Gucci, Prada, Louis Vuitton, and Chanel, all began producing purses in mass with their logo as the very pattern of the fabric. Without lowering the cost of the product, the designer handbag brigade began making purses that could be identified visually as being an icon of the upper class. Sure, before this era began, you COULD have spent all your hard earned money on a black Chanel purse that no one would know was Chanel except for the fashion obsessed (and even still, they’d probably just assume it was fake), but I think you can all see how much more appealing it would be to acquire this status item, if most people could identify it as such, and, therefore, you can also see how people would be all the more willing to throw down a cool grand if they can fake having this lifestyle for whatever reason or whatever pleasure they derive from doing so.

At first I complicated my theory unnecessarily. I started looking at the bigger picture of what such consumerism and such materialism was doing to the motivation of a young and impressionable society. Perhaps, this new age suggested that more and more women were signing up for the life of a gold-digger, and, perhaps, junior hockey players were small fish to fry in the grander scheme of NHL players and investment bankers. I decided, however, that, if there was something to this designer handbag theory, the cause could be found in the simplistic. These young pucks, running around with their Coach bags and Armani sunglasses, are, quite simply, TOO BROKE to afford hockey tickets. Sure, OHL games are cheap, but if you’re in high school, and either have no job or, if you do, you work at McDonald’s, you likely can’t afford to have your cake and eat it too. Especially when you consider that the designer purses, shoes, jeans also have to be constantly maintained with hair dye and trips to the tanning salon. And let me tell you, it used to cost me $250 a month just to maintain blonde hair – that’s a car payment for some people! Anyway, in the bigger picture, most puck bunnies realize that hockey players are hard birds to cage, and, therefore, attempting to impress the rest of the world becomes a much more lucrative investment.

Of course, not ALL puck bunnies play their games while rink side. Many junior level puck bunnies use the high school campus as a much more accessible hunting ground. However, that’s another story for another day. Stay tuned for more of my crazy theories, as Puck Bunny Month draws to a close.

Taken before I made an A&W pit stop. With attractions like these, are you surprised that this is the home town of Avril Lavigne?

Roll the credits…

(I like this video because Avril_Bambi and Avril_Carmen are in it.)

I was warned that the Jack Gatecliff Arena was really run down (it’s the oldest arena in the league), so I was pleasantly surprised to discover that it wasn’t nearly as bad as they were making it out to be. I’ve definitely seen worse in my day! I got there an hour before the gates opened, so I got a special VIP tour of the facility and all the young men doing their pregame workouts, etc. It’s funny how, “They’re only 17!” can change to, “Well…they COULD be 19!” with but a few sweaty laps around the track.

Before the game started, I had scouted out the usual locations the puck bunnies were said to frequent at this arena. But they didn’t show up. Not even the girlfriends seemed to be in attendance that night. Was the fact that it was a school night a factor in this absence? Have I just lost touch with what modern day, authentic puck bunnies actually look like? Or is there another reason for the scarcity of puck bunnies at the three OHL rinks I have visited this season? These are the questions and topics I will be addressing as Puck Bunny Month continues. I want answers!

There was actually one question that I posed in an earlier post about the effect the lack of puck bunnies would have on this new wave of junior hockey players. Junior hockey clubs like to celebrate scholastic excellence in their players. Last night, they honoured Freddie Hamilton, one of two Hamilton brothers on the Ice Dogs team for his overall, COMBINED average for his most recent term in high school. The kid’s effing average was ninety-eight percent, putting his brother’s ninety-seven to shame! HOLY FUCK! I think we just discovered one of the MANY byproducts of puck bunny scarcity. Nothing to screw? Let’s do homework instead!

The game itself was full of drama. Exactly twenty seconds into the first period, a hard check into the boards caused a panel of Plexiglas to come loose. Twenty minutes later it was finally fixed. And that wasn’t the only mishap of the game. With 13:06 left in the third, the power completely went out. It was actually pretty amusing to see how quickly people whipped out their cell phones and started waving them around like they were at a rock show. Eventually, the fans hurled their Great Wolf Lodge squishy pucks onto the ice in protest. I was OUTRAGED. Back when I worked for MLSE, we has a few of those squishy stress pucks floating around the office, and we used to fight over them These people clearly did not understand the value of the squish.

The Dogs were only up 2-0 at the time of the outage, so with over thirteen minutes to go, it wasn’t fair to the Gens to call it because ANYTHING can happen in that kind of time. Not to mention the fact that the OHL playoffs begin in a few short weeks, and both teams are battling for a spot. The commissioner said if the lights weren’t back on at 10:30 PM the game was going to be called. At 10:29 PM on the nose, God said, “Let there be light!” And the game was to resume. However, the power had been out for almost an hour at this point, and all but maybe a hundred people had bothered to stick it out.

With the excess removed from the stands, it was easy to see the handful of puck bunnies that had been camouflaged before the blackout. But still, the girls had no game. One group was complaining because the players had been sent back to the locker rooms, and they felt that during this time of uncertainty the players should have either just been skating laps around the rink looking for them pressed up against the glass, or actually walking around on foot (making them easy targets). Another group had baked cookies, but got so excited about the fact that they could sit ANYWHERE now that everyone had left, that they started to cry. Sitting RIGHT beside the bench was too much for them to handle, and they vacated immediately. I just sat their shaking my head, “No game; no game at all!”

This power outage was the best thing that could have happened to a puck bunny. Not only could you sit wherever you wanted when the game resumed, but the players were given another warm up! Two warm ups in ONE game, that’s puck bunny heaven if I ever heard of one. But these young pucks just didn’t know how to properly utilize the situation. Granted the Ice Dogs have only been calling the Niagara region home since 2007, but come on! Am I just the most lethal puck bunny that ever lived? Not in the sense that I am one, but in the sense that after years of studying the most extreme cases, have I managed to put together the most deadly game plan around? And why have I never used it? Perhaps, my next book should be a self-help book for aspiring bunnies.

Maybe you are thinking that I’ve lost my touch. Maybe these girls I identified as puck bunnies, aren’t actually puck bunnies. Shall I now direct your attention back to the top photo. The sign says, “I want a Gen in my underwear.” Wow. I didn’t make that sign. A threesome of pucks were holding it up all game. They had made the trek to St. Kitts from Oshawa, and let me tell you, that’s quite the hike for a bunch of young drivers. When the game ended, they discarded the sign, which gave me the opportunity to steal it, and take a picture with it. No…we didn’t fish it out of the garbage or anything… Oh, the things I’ll do for a laugh.

Roll the credits…

(Alexisonfire another product from St. Catharines, Ontario)

So, to kick off the festivities, I’ve decided to repost the puck bunny quiz as seen in the pages of my book Down the Rabbit Hole: A Guide to Puck Bunnies (2004). The quiz was a big hit when it was originally posted in the summer. I think I had something like 200 new followers on Twitter that day! That was a big deal at the time because I had only been on the Twitter train for a few weeks at that point! Anyway, I hope the new wave of Psycho Lady readers will enjoy it just as much! Get excited, it’s almost Puck Bunny Month!!

1. How many hockey games do you attend per season?
[a] Less than ten games per season.
[b] One game a week. Usually every Friday home game.
[c] All the home games, and the odd road game.

2. You and your friends notice a new player on your favourite team. You say,
[a] “Was #28 on the team before?”
[b] “#28 was just traded here a couple days ago. He’s 6’2,” 205lbs, and a Scorpio.”
[c] “Wow, #28 is cute! I bet his dick is huge!”

3. Your hockey shrine consists of:
[a] A mint condition game day program.
[b] A game day program complete with team signatures, tickets from every game you have ever attended, a team flag, both home and road jerseys (also complete with signatures), homemade pompoms, newspaper clippings, a few tapes of games recorded off TV, and a framed picture of you and that hottie #8.
[c] A disc that contains naked images of you and three members of your hometown team, condom wrappers labeled with the names and numbers of the players who used them, and the pair of boxers that you stole from #8 after you slept with him…or was it #14?

4. It’s your favourite hometown hero’s birthday. To honour this occasion, you:
[a] Send him an e-greeting.
[b] Get together with your friends and bake him a birthday cake, but eat it yourselves.
[c] Give him a blowjob.

5. It’s game day, and you have front row seats. You need to look extra good. You:
[a] Brush your hair, and keep a lip gloss on hand.
[b] Schedule a day at the beauty salon.
[c] Decide that a transparent t-shirt bearing the words, “Lick Me” is best worn sans bra.

6. The best aspect of hockey is:
[a] The fights.
[b] The hot, sweaty boys roughing each other up.
[c] The well sculpted male specimens who play with big sticks.

7. History class is starting to drag. As usual, you:
[a] Chat to your friend about tonight’s game.
[b] Draw pictures of your hockey boys, and doodle their initials on your binder.
[c] Write a detailed entry in your sex diary about what you and #25 did last night.

8. The team is on the road and the hockey game is not on TV. You:
[a] Will read about it in tomorrow’s paper.
[b] Drive to the arena with your friend, for ambiance, and tune into the game on your local AM radio station.
[c] Could care less. You are at the game.

9. You like hockey players because:
[a] They are extraordinarily talented athletes.
[b] They’re cute.
[c] They have the good and know how to use them.

10. The word you most associate with hockey is:
[a] Power-play.
[b] Bunny.
[c] Naked.

11. When discussing last night’s game, you remark:
[a] “#32 got a game misconduct after he got into a huge fight.”
[b] “#32 looked at me three times during the warm up.”
[c] “I messed around with #32 last night.”

12. How many hockey players do you know personally?
[a] Two
[b] Six
[c] Twenty-nine.

13. If a hockey player were to talk to you, he’d say:
[a] “Nice to meet you.”
[b] “Thanks, you’re a cutie, too.”
[c] “Oh, that feels so good!”

14. Your pregame ritual involves:
[a] Double-checking your purse to make sure you have the tickets.
[b] Eating your favourite player’s favourite food and listening to a CD of the team’s warm up music.
[c] The removal of all “inconvenient” body hair.

15. If your hometown did not have a hockey team, you:
[a] Would get a new hobby.
[b] Don’t want to think about it.
[c] Would be a virgin.

Scoring

Mostly A’s – Puck Bunny in Denial

When people accuse you of being a puck bunny, you usually get defensive. You have a sincere love for hockey and know a great deal about it. You may have had genuine intentions when you started going to local hockey games, but had a hard time ignoring the allure of the hockey players. You are likely to educate your friends on how you are above puck bunnies because you know how to call an offside. You try to get to know a few players on your hometown team, which is okay as long as you do not throw yourself at them. You have most likely slept with a hockey player or two. You think this behaviour does not make you a puck bunny because they are the ones who came on to you. You are hurt when a hockey player uses you. You feel like he has treated you like a puck bunny, and you know that you are not one. Truthfully, you do get carried away with hockey. Sometimes it is just more fun to focus on the players than it is on the game.

Mostly B’s – Puck Bunny and Proud of It

You love being a puck bunny, and try to incorporate your bunnyism into all aspects of your life. You know a good number of players on your hometown team, and live by the things they say to you. You have an innocent approach with the hockey players. You fantasize about being their girlfriend, and all the cuddling privileges that comes with the title. You have never slept with a hockey player, or even fooled around with one. Your obsession for hockey players exceeds that of any other type of puck bunny. You keep everything related to your hometown heroes, from tickets to a piece of gum that you saw one spit out. You stay true to one team, and act as the promotions coordinator a lot of the time. You introduce everyone you know to local hockey. You sport team logos and colours everywhere that you go and in everything that you do, like decorating a birthday cake for your favourite player. In the offseason you work diligently on the fan website that you created.

Mostly C’s – Puck Slut

You may, or may not go to many hockey games, but you are well aware that you are a puck bunny. You feel that your breed is the only true form of the puck bunny, as you believe that girls are not puck bunnies unless they sleep with hockey players. To say that you have had sex with these boys is an understatement. You do whatever a hockey player wants you to, and you are not ashamed that you have been passed around the team. Members of various other hockey teams also know you. You appreciated being able to accurately picture members of both teams naked when they are being physical with each other and fighting on the ice. However, you are not made of stone. You secretly hope to be a player’s girlfriend someday. If a hockey player uses you, it hurts. To deal with this rejection, you sleep with more hockey players; perhaps hoping that the one who wronged you will be jealous. You do love to brag about all your sexual adventures with the hockey gods. You have been around the league and done things characteristic of black market porn.

By some miracle I remembered my way back to the rink. I haven’t been there since the end of 2004. Instead of Google Mapping the directions, I thought it would be more fun to see if I could get us there by memory. I’m telling you, I was 80% positive that we weren’t going to be seeing any hockey that night. If you’ve never been to Guelph, then you probably can’t quite grasp the difficulty of this mission. See, Guelph is known for having six-way intersections without even a HINT of a grid system. The first time I went there, I got so lost that I had to follow the visiting team’s bus in order to actually find the arena! Anyway, I’m not really sure what happened this time, I must have gone into some type of subconscious cruise control mode, because as soon as I saw a strange hidden intersection, I knew I had to turn (and by “turn” I mean “reckless swerve.”) Of course, The Co-Operators, a.k.a. the only office building in Guelph (I’m pretty sure), did help to guide my way after I made that turn. Once I saw their logo glowing in the distant night sky, I knew that we were close and hockey would be on the agenda after all.

But the victory of our successful twenty minute journey was short-lived when the ticket agent told us we were limited to two options for the game against the London Knights that night – standing room, or pimp suite. Umm, we’ll take pimp suite for 200, Alex! The suites were actually reasonably priced at $29 a head, but the downside is that you’re paying extra to share closed quarters with God knows who else. Our suite, number 27, was already occupied with a family of blondes with a major attitude problem – perfect! They gave us a nice stare down when we walked in like we had no right to be there. Apparently, they didn’t grasp the magnitude of my BMF cowgirl shirt. We knew we’d have a hard time dealing with these beasts without the assistance of our good friend, the cocktail bar.

The bar wasn’t in the suite or “stee” as I was calling it based on the letters STE printed on the ticket. It was a bit of a hike to get to that shining beacon of safety. They had a custom drink menu! My drink was boldly revolting in a strangely tolerable and almost enjoyable way. How fitting that my drink of choice was named, The Hockey Star. While watching the warm ups from the bar area, I had my most resilient idea of the night. Instead of going back to Stee 27, we’d sneak into 26 and lay low. It was pure luck that Stee 26 was the ONLY stee that was completely empty for the entire game. However, what seemed like a lucky break at first (a whole suite to ourselves), would soon turn out to be a nuisance which added more than a little stress to the game experience.

Half way through the first period an argument began to brew outside our door. Some type of suite manager (West Witch) was yelling at one of the security guards on account of the fact that there were only two people in our stee. My friend kept turning around and watching them, “Stop it. Stop it. Don’t do that.” I whispered while not taking my eyes off the game, “Don’t make it look like we’re not supposed to be in here.” What was hilarious about the argument was that the West Witch seemed to think that the box office was to blame for our presence in Stee 26. Apparently, they dropped the ball and gave us tickets they shouldn’t have. First of all, why was the security guard getting shit on for this, and, come on, did they not even CONSIDER that we may have just snuck in there, like we ACTUALLY did!? Despite that being mildly hilarious, the incident set an uneasy tone for the rest of the game. You can probably imagine that we were constantly looking over our shoulder whenever we sensed motion in the hallway.

And it didn’t help our paranoia that, Stormy, the new second mascot of the team behind Spyke, was stalking us. I’ve had several “incidences” with mascots in my day, but, given that the West Witch was on the prowl during the game, this one was far more startling. Originally, Stormy came into our stee and hugged us, etc, photo op, you know the drill – no big deal. Later on in the game, my hair stood on end when I began to sense movement in the room. Was it the West Witch? We didn’t want to turn around and look suspicious, so we kept our eyes on the ice. Then the heavy breathing started, but still we froze in our game watching position. Then it grabbed us! Fucking STORMY! Then he laughed and laughed in his mute mascot manner. I quickly theorized that we shouldn’t be fooled by his super cute and lovable exterior, he was probably working for the West Witch, and sent to spy on us and capture incriminating dialogue confessing to sneaking into Stee 26. Well, we didn’t give him the satisfaction – HA!

By the time the buzzer sounded to end the game, we still had not had a showdown with the West Witch. The shit storm never came, but that wasn’t the only thing that didn’t bother to show up. As I kept exclaiming throughout the game in an exasperated tone, “WHERE DEM BLONDES AT?” There were almost no puck bunnies at this game, and I only got to say, “Did you leave your red lollipop at home?” once! Were puck bunnies becoming extinct? Do I need to do another field study? In the last six years, Guelph, London, and Kitchener (twice) have all won the J. Ross Robertson trophy. Tickets became scarce in this puck bunny hot bed. Did the bunnies go extinct with the tickets? And what does this mean for not only their future, but this new generation of hockey players as well? Such questions need answers!

The last time I was in Guelph for a Storm game, I was eighteen years old. Coincidentally, the Storm were playing the London Knights that night as well for the 2004 OHL playoffs. Back then the teams looked very different. Instead of watching “LIIIIIITTTTTTTTTTTLE BOOOYYYYYYYS” (my cheer of the game), NHL stars like Daniel Paille (Bruins), Ryan Callahan (Rangers), Daniel Girardi (Rangers), Kevin Klein (Predators), Cam Janssen (Blues), Ryan Parent (Flyers), faced off against Brandon Prust (Flames), David Bolland (Blackhawks), Corey Perry (Ducks), Rob Schremp (Islanders), Dennis Wideman (Bruins), and Danny Syvret (Flyers). The players seemed so much older back then. It’s hard to believe that some of the liiiiiiiiiiiitttttle booooooyssss skating around that night will someday join the ranks of those listed above. Oh, P.S. one of the London Knights’ players is named, Knight! HAHA! Small things amuse me.

Anyway, that does it for my final game of 2009! I’ll be kicking off the 2010 half of the season by turning over a new leaf on Saturday when I retrace my steps along Lake Michigan for the first time since 2005! I’m more than done with the old (Coyotes), and waiting with open arms to welcome all the new year has to offer! Happy New Year, hockey fans!

Roll the credits…

(This was my jam when I was 17. I hate it when there are too many rookies, and not enough pros… P.S. Explicit Lyrics Warning!)