Fast forward to present day, and here I am in Japan. It was difficult to make the decision to finally leave North America again, but I found my only solace in that Japan was the dominant country involved in the ALH, and I pledged to take advantage of my second chance to experience another level of hockey. Believe it or not one of the reasons I chose Japan was because of the Asia League. I actually had my heart set on Taiwan, initially. One of my biggest regrets in Korea was that traveling North for hockey was a daunting task even though the trip was the equivalent of the stretch of road spanning between the Air Canada Centre and the Bell Centre. I had no car, and I wasn’t all that jazzed about taking the bus either. Plus, I was sucked into the black hole that was Ulsan and its constant scandals and high school like drama. It was hard to pull yourself away on a Saturday morning, especially if you made the mistake of “making an appearance” in the district on Friday night… and that just happened to be my second favourite mistake to make!

This long weekend, the third in a row for me, the 2011-12 ALH regular season begins, and I couldn’t be more excited than if there was a game scheduled anywhere near me before October 1st! The countdown is on! So, in anticipation of the blessed day, I’ll try to get you as up to speed on the Asia League as I can without regurgitating the stuff I wrote about last season.

Well after I abandoned Korea and, more importantly my Korean team of choice, the Anyang Halla, the boys continued there assault on the other six teams in Korea, Japan, and China, and found themselves back in the Championship (they were the 2010 defending champs, too!) in March against the Tohoku Free Blades, a Japanese team with two home towns – one in Aomori and one in Fukushima, a name you are all probably familiar with. Tragedy struck in the form of one the biggest earthquakes to ever devastate Japan. As a result, the Championship was called off, and the ALH crowned two champions to conclude the 2010-11 hockey season.

Surprisingly, all seven teams have returned this season. I thought the ALH was going to take a fatal hit after the earthquake, but even Tohoku is participating. The Nikko Ice Bucks will be the team that I follow the most while I’m in Japan, but following any team in this League is a difficult task. Games aren’t televised, the Asia League website must have laid off their web content guy because they NEVER post anything, and Google Translate can only do so much for the content posted on the individual team sites! You can’t even purchase tickets online! Brutal.

A lot of us back in NHL Land throw around the concept of “growing the game” like we actually have an understanding of what this means because there are multimillion dollar teams in places like Arizona and Florida. However, until you experience a set up like the one here in the ALH, you really have no idea what is actually involved in growing the game from the ground up. In the ALH games are scheduled almost exclusively on weekends, and clubs often venture from their home rinks into neutral facilities to bring hockey to cities that go without. The season is sporadically interrupted with tournaments and other events that serve the same purpose. Fans show up early to secure a ticket, and put their stuff down on the bleacher style seating to mark their place before they run to the convenience store across the street to buy their own beer. After spending so much time in the NHL, AHL, and OHL, it’s pretty sobering to see rec league presentation of professional talent.

If there was one good thing I could say about being a hockey fan in Asia, it’s that being here really makes you appreciate the game without all the frills and drama that I’ve come to associate with it. Being physically away from the NHL for the first chunk of the 2010-11 season forced me to reconnect to the parts of the game that had taken a back seat due to circumstances and the life choices I’ve made along the way. Not to mention there were no she-pigs feeling threatened and spreading made up shit because I was out of sight and therefore not taking down their secret dream guys hahaha. But then again it could just be a case of illiteracy, you know, on account of the fact that they seem to actually believe that what they “read” is actually written on my site. Not really sure. P.S. If you really want to know, since you asked and all, “hockey” tastes like winning and everywhere you seem to wish you were, honey.

Anyway, the other night I was over at my American friend’s house and forcing him to watch clip after clip of hockey fights, Don Cherry’s wittiest moments, and TSN Top 10 Lists on YouTube. He’s not really into league sports, so I’m sure he wasn’t as into it as I was. It reminded me of my ritual back in Korea with another Leafs fan. We’d always get together, drink, and watch the Leafs game he downloaded from the night before. Watching those games would always bring me back to being a 15 year old in my Labatt stained Potvin jersey, and watching every single Leafs game like my life depended on it without having to worry or care about all the boy drama that was just on the horizon, or the woman-hating “feminists” that seem to think they can control how a female hockey fan dresses, and what they can and can’t like doing in bed. Hey, it’s not my problem if they just like to lay there – it’s not MY business, after all.

Oh, to be rid of such distractions! I envy those of you that have managed to stay out of the underworld of hockey, I really do. And who knows maybe a few months of ALH hockey before I begin my two week reign of terror in the North American hockey leagues in December will help me to appreciate the game the way I did when I was an innocent. Maybe. Sometimes the drama adds a little something extra to the overall game experience. C’est la vie.

Click here if you want to know what I really have to say!

You already know all about my first Asia League experience, but you’re still waiting on the ending to my final road trip for the 09-10 season – oopsies! Why do I have a feeling this going to be an ongoing struggle? It’s a shame really because the last day of that trip in Denver was really quite epic. Oh yeah, and speaking of hockey, a little thing called the NHL season started up this month. My buddy, fellow Torontonian and Leafs fan extraordinaire, has allowed me to adopt his ritual for watching Leafs games in Korea. I will make a post on this later. However, no matter how much I beg to watch some of the other games, he claims that only Leafs games will be shown in his house. He’s been here for nearly 2 years. It’s nice to see the dedication to his team because it can get very difficult keeping tabs from overseas. As such a huge fan, I don’t know how he can stay away from Leafs Nation for multiple years. I tell ya, I couldn’t do it!

As for the aforementioned drama, I don’t really have much to say on that. However, maybe Carmen will fill you in later. Stay tuned for a post from her likely to be entitled, “Dear Old Man Balls…” It’s the new Dear John! Well, until next month….

Top Photo: My most overused word in Japan…

P.S. Yes, there were some more hockey names issued this month. Here’s the updated list:

Boys:

1.Messier
2. Bauer
3. Scotty (Bowman)
4. Ovi
5. Modano
6. Bure (Pavel)
7. Maurice (Richard)
8. Linden [New]
9. Cherry [New] (He’s gay and wanted a name to keep up with Bambi and, yes, Midnight Bambi!?!?!…dun…dun…dun! Read more about him at Canadian Psycho Worldwide!)

Girls:

1. Darcy (Tucker)
2. Vezina
3. Quinn
4. Kovy
5. Souray
6. Bobby (Clarke)

Whenever the NHL isn’t a buzz with CBA violations or the Phoenix situation, “growing the game” seems to be their shared mandate with all righteous hockey fans. There are “ICE” (shudders) hockey leagues all over the world ranging from nameless house leagues to leagues that are giving the NHL a run for their money, like the KHL in Russia. The Asia League produces a surprisingly high quality game on the ice. Players skate like energetic Canadian juniors, and the fans have embraced the team in the style of a booster club in Hershey… or Charlestown.

The quality of the sport in the Asia League is likely the influence of a steady history of players imported from professional leagues in countries where hockey reigns supreme. Although hockey is probably the most expensive sport to play anywhere in the world, in Asia, hockey is very much a rich man’s game. For example, hockey skates run at three of four times the price as the exact same model in North America. Most locals cannot afford to learn to skate, let alone play hockey. So, it is only logical that the future of hockey in Asia would need more than a little assistance from the West.

Currently, each of the seven active clubs in the ALH (with teams in China, South Korea, and Japan) has an allowance of a maximum of four import players on their roster per season. A player is considered an import if that player is not of Asian descent; meaning a Japanese player is not considered an import on a Chinese or South Korean team, for example. I was surprised to learn that Asian-Americans, Asian-Canadians, or Asian-Etcs were, in fact, not regarded as imports when their knowledge and practice of the game would obviously fall into that “unfair advantage” category no more or less than a Caucasian-Canadian would. Nevertheless, these are the current laws governing imports in the ALH – until next season that is.

Asia League officials announced that they are making a bold move to reduce the number of imports permitted on each roster to a maximum of three in the 2011-12 season, and finally a meager two by 2012-13. The reasoning behind this rule change is to give Asian hockey players a better platform to showcase their talent to the likes of the National Hockey League. With the exception of New York Islanders owner, Charles Wang, and his efforts to spread hockey goodness in China, I, personally, haven’t heard of too many NHL endorsed hockey ventures in the East. Who knows if they even have Asia based scouts on the payroll?!

The whole nationalist or, rather, continentalist approach to the sudden reduction in import allowances is reminiscent of the NCAA’s controversial decision to allow Canadian hockey players to flood the talent pools in college clubs across the United States. At that time, both sides of the border were up in arms over the decision. Canadian teams felt that the US was depleting the talent level on Canadian soil, and, quite literally, stealing their national treasures. The American stance was that Canadian hockey players, who were often in their thirties with wife and children in tow, were cheating young, talented American men out of scholarships, and depriving them of their education. The issue became one of patriotism, and took on a strong “us versus them” tone, which caused many in-team conflicts for one side or the other, that would later need to be controlled with an entirely new set of rules. The business side of things only seemed relevant to the head honchos at the NCAA.

It is interesting that in the case of the ALH, the powers that be were not considering the bottom line in making this decision. Upper management at the club level is, naturally, raising Hell over the announcement because foreign talent translates to success both on and off the ice, and at some level the League must understand this. Import players are paid nearly double what the Asian players are banking, and more than the average player in the American Hockey League, I might add. Furthermore, the fans that are paying to fill the small arenas every night are overwhelmingly Canadian born. It is almost like the ALH is jumping the gun, or suffering from delusions of grandeur. How can a league that has only existed in its current form since 2003, suddenly just be ready to cut ties with Western talent in hopes of attracting NHL attention? Especially when some teams rely on importing coaches and trainers from Canadian universities to assist them in training camp.

The game of hockey changed forever when the NCAA made their controversial decision. At the time, the American style of play was almost entirely centred on finesse. With the introduction of the more physical Canadian style in the NCAA, American players were able to change their game to meet the standards that we are used to seeing today. One could argue that this historical decision by the NCAA is one of the biggest factors in the uprising of American born success within professional circles like the NHL.

Like with these American college students of old, physical play is somewhat frowned upon in the ALH, and so these players, even if they were at the NHL level skill wise (which they aren’t), would simply not be able to adjust to the Western style of hockey. When it comes down to it, in South Korea, home to two of the seven ALH franchises (Anyang Halla, Chuncheon High1), “ICE” (cold sweat) hockey is not even a sport acknowledged by the government. All Korean men must perform a mandatory two years of military service, however, athletes are exempt from this duty if they are champions. Unfortunately, being an “ICE” (vomits) hockey champion doesn’t get you out of the army. Here are a couple of the more “interesting” sports that will get the free pass, FIELD hockey, and badminton, yes, badminton. That should put things in perspective. So, until the time that hockey is considered a legitimate sport in Asia, and the League both embraces and learns from their imports, only then should they start planning the ball for the NHL brass, or even begin to consider cutting their Western tutors from their rosters. I can tell you right now, the fans are dreading the quality of the on ice product come September 2012. Hopefully, for the sake of the growth of hockey on the other side of the world, the fans don’t decide to abandon the Asia League altogether.

10. Ticket Prices

Especially at the Air Canada Centre and Madison Square Garden – Yowza!

9. Female puck bunnies, I mean… hockey fans… that pay good money to go to a hockey game (or not go), just so they can complain about the fact that my seats were close to the ice to rally support for their she-pig/mother-of-3 hate campaigns.

It would be more valuable for you to just focus on the game, ladies. Perhaps, you’ll learn that this season when I’m not around.

8. The Philadelphia Flyers feed on NHL Center Ice

It’s always the worst! Maybe it will be fixed when I get back.

7. Hockey wives and girlfriends

Particularly those of the rank-hag variety that are in the habit of illegally posting my personal shit online because they are insecure and have man hands and the face of a 40 year old football (only much, much bigger).

6. Liquid Gold

$13 for a domestic beer? Cripes!

5. Pre warm-up jitters.

Don’t ask me why, but before every game I have an internal freak out like I’m the one about to take to the ice in front of 20 000 people. I have not gone a single game without it.

4. The Springtime bandwagon rush.

You couldn’t be bothered in October, but now you’ll steal my tickets right from under me? Me no dink doh!

3. The “situation” in Phoenix.

Enough with the empty threats! When did Winnipeg get a second chance, let alone a million?

2. Twitter-Blog stalkers.

Among others.

1. Jock Sniffers.

“Friends” that will throw you under the bus if they think it means an NHL player might like them more if they were ever to meet.