Once upon a time, in what almost seems like a dream now, Sean Avery stepped in front of the media in Calgary, and opened his mouth. Now I’m not your typical self-righteous, politically correct type, but I thought the whole thing was hilarious. I thought it spoke to the drama that fans were likely already injecting into a tilt between Sean Avery and Dion Phaneuf. It gave the fans a little more anticipation and a little more incentive to watch the Stars/Flames game that night, but the League obviously did not see any value in that, and ensured that Avery did not play that night. We saw more censorship over the offseason when Paul Bissonnette was forced to deactivate his uber sensational Twitter account. However, not surprisingly, it seemed like the hockey community online cared more about not being able to know what BizNasty was doing in the bathroom, than they did about what transactions were being made around the NHL.
The 2010-11 NHL season is but a week old, and there have already been two very questionable suspensions. I’m talking of course of the Nick Boynton and James Wisniewski incidents. Both players earned themselves some unwanted time in the press box for hand gestures, yes, hand gestures made on the ice.
Really…?
What’s next? Will players be suspended for on ice chirps as well? I know it’s hard to see everything happening on the ice from the swanky luxuries on the NHL suite, but everyone seated in the lower bowl and watching at home are more than aware when a player calls another player a “mother fucker” or a “stupid bitch.” It’s pretty ridiculous that the League would want to censor the trash talk that occurs during the game. It’s a natural part of competition. Is this a sign that the powers that be are going to make another run at eliminating fighting from the game?
Justin Lupi, a fellow displaced Leafs fan living in Edmonton, had this to say, “I guess gesturing is more damaging than that Matt Cooke elbow on Savard last year. I just think it’s ridiculous that they try to enforce PG rules in an R rated environment.” Indeed. The League would have been better off to just ignore both incidents; particularly in the case of the Nick Boynton and Blair Jones skirmish. As you can see in this clip, the “throat slashing” gesture looked more like a Kanye West dance move than anything menacing. And trust me, I know menacing. If I were going to make said gesture at a hockey game, and I’m sure I’ve thought about it more than once, I would do it NICE. AND. SLOW. So the message would not be lost on the dumb, of course.
The James Wisniewski and Sean Avery altercation was, granted, a little more graphic, but even still, with the exception of the YouTube community, I doubt many people watching the game even noticed the phantom blow job. Again, the League would have been better off just ignoring the whole thing. Of course, the reality is that once the League cracks down on one guy, they will have to crack down on everyone no matter how ridiculous the misdemeanors are.
Sadly, after I saw the footage of the Rangers/Islanders game, I was going to declare the Rangers my new team to watch as Avery is clearly just a magnet for confrontation, whether he’s the instigator or not. Now the outlook is bleak. With the NHL cracking down on body language, you can be sure that players on all thirty teams are going to be cleaning up their acts so as not to offend the listening challenged. It’s a shame really when you think about it. In an age where things like WWE, Jersey Shore, and TMZ reign supreme, perhaps if hockey players were allowed to be a little more “real,” the game would be a little more popular.
Luckily, we still have sexually suggestive colour commentary to look forward to.
















