For those of you who couldn’t tune in to HockeyBuzz for tonight’s 2 hour LIVE Season Preveiw, and would love another chance to listen to me make an ass out of myself, then click here for the podcast version of the show! I actually had to talk about REAL hockey stuff, guys! You can also tell by my voice that I still have not fully recovered from my feverish episode when the Flyers were in town. Enjoy!
If it wasn’t bad enough that those pesky Penguins won the Stanley Cup and ruined my Red Wings playoff prediction (grrr), my victory lap in Vegas was soured by the rejection of Balsillie’s bid to relocate the Phoenix Coyotes to my backyard. Surprisingly, I wasn’t overly disappointed. I’m still in the middle of my off season re-evaluation, and so I haven’t quite decided what I’m planning to do for the 2009-10 season as of yet. It’s entirely possible that I will not support the Phoenix Coyotes next year or their Steel Town equivalent.
Balsillie claims that his fight is not over, and maybe it’s not, but let’s face it, there won’t be NHL hockey in Hamilton next season (I haven’t forgotten about you, Bulldogs). The Coyotes have until September 15th to find a viable owner; this shouldn’t be a problem as the League has alleged several offers from parties with Glendale’s best interests at heart. However, should these offers be yet another Bettman bluff, then come September 15th who knows what will go down. If the League has to fund the losses for the club for yet another season (an estimated $45M in 09-10), then the Coyotes will likely pack up and head North to Winnipeg, the location with the League’s supposed stamp of approval.
For the short term, keeping the Coyotes in their Jobing.com desert oasis for another season is likely the best option for all parties involved. The Southern Ontarian fan base has had a massive publicity showcase for the last several weeks, and Balsillie’s Make It Seven campaign has rallied support from nearly 200K Canucks including major Canadian brands such as Labatt, Home Hardware, First Ontario Credit Union, and DeWalt Tools. With the 416/905 in the spotlight, the League would be crazy not to put the Golden Horseshoe at the top of the NHL expansion list.
In terms of benefiting the League, not only do they win this initial case on relocation, but they also save face. Now the League is free to determine for themselves that the Coyotes cannot survive in the desert, and they can, thus, relocate them when, where, and how they see fit. After all, this was about a “respect for the rules!” The League doesn’t want to be told that their teams are in trouble especially not by some richie rich tech billionaire, they want to come to this realization on their own. Unfortunately, the League is likely to be soured on giving the Coyotes to Hamilton – that would be too close to a Balsillie victory – but don’t be surprised if the Winnipeg Jets take a reunion flight by 2011!
Unfortunately, the loser in all of this legal and financial mess is the pocket-sized hockey fan base in Arizona. These few but prouds are likely to be basking in the glow of their temporary victory. If they were smart they would do their part to rally as much support for the Coyotes as possible to ensure a large enough peak in sales to keep the creditors at bay. Unfortunately, the Phoenix fans are asking people to part with their hard earned money at times of economic tight fisting – a battle that even the Detroit powerhouse is losing! Hopefully, in the interest of the Phoenix faithful, the close call this summer will help to boost sales and save the desert dogs, but don’t be surprised if it has had the opposite effect (who wants to invest in unstable stock ). Remember, Phoenix: the League is not your friend; they only had your back this round. When all is said and done, the NHL is a business, and the Phoenix office is the red year after year. Enjoy this hockey season, Arizona – it might be your last.
The NHL is maintaining that Coyotes’ majority owner Jerry Moyes was not in control of the team at the time that he filed for Chapter 11 bankruptcy (the move which led to Jim Balsillie’s bid for purchase and relocation of the team), and thus that the filing is not valid (which makes you wonder why Moyes would proceed in the first place). I’m not a lawyer or anything, but that seems pretty black and white. If this document exists then the filing wasn’t legit, and the NHL will win on May 19th. You would think that the league would be happy or at least confident in knowing that they possessed such a valuable document; but that’s not the case. Instead, Bill Daly and Gary Bettman have mounted a full on campaign to villanize Jim Balsillie which seems to be geared towards turning the other 29 NHL owners against him. Why bother you ask? After all, if the filing wasn’t legit then the process will not even get to the owners vote on relocation.
On the other side we have Jim Balsillie who has continued progress toward prepping Hamilton for the arrival of the desert dogs. While the league has been scrambling like the Republican party of the Obama/McCain faceoff last fall, Balsillie has been working out agreements with the city of Hamilton for the permanent use of Copps Coliseum. Both parties seem to be working towards the same event, an event that occurs well after these bankruptcy proceedings – and that is the vote on relocation. Sounds like the league doesn’t have an ace up their sleeve after all. Don’t be surprised if, much like in the Obama/McCain election, Phoenix will lose.
As for the owners, perhaps the league is trying to cast a negative spotlight on Jim Balsillie as a way to confuse them from questioning their actions regarding Jerry Moyes. Bill Daly has been putting words into the mouths of the other 29 owners, stating that he doesn’t believe that they will take too kindly to the way Mr. Balsillie has gone about acquiring his hockey club. The truth of the matter is Balsillie made a bid, and with that bid he has stated that he is willing to pay a lot of money for the Coyotes franchise but only on the condition that the team be moved to a viable market. If this doesn’t fly with the league, then they don’t get his money plain and simple. This isn’t a charity venture it’s a business venture. There is no gun being held to the proverbial head of the National Hockey League.
It’s my feeling that the owners should be more concerned with the behaviour of the league in how they have dealt with both Balsillie and Moyes. The league apparently has the right to strip owners of their authority when they do something that the league doesn’t like. As an owner investing hundreds of millions of dollars in a team I would not feel secure in that role any longer. I would also not feel secure in a league that cries about enforcing the “rules” when they change the rules as it suits them. I would not want to do business with an organization that feels they can “insert clauses” as they see fit and blow smoke up the behinds of fans and owners alike.
I’m not sure why anyone would listen to Bettman’s radio show. You can’t trust anything coming out of the mouth of the league. After all, only a matter of weeks ago Bettman was in Phoenix claiming that everything was fine and that Jerry Moyes was controlling team! They seem to be lying to us worse than a politician desperate for votes. Trust no one. http://makeitseven.ca
Self-righteous hockey fans everywhere have their tea-drinking pinky fingers out of joint over the recent news that Sean Avery has made his return to professional hockey. Back in December, Avery received a permanent suspension from the Dallas Stars organization after making “crude” remarks about his sloppy seconds…oops, I mean *ex-girlfriends* and their relationships with other NHL players.
Upon completion of a league counseling program, Avery cleared waivers and was welcomed by the Rangers organization to suit up with their American Hockey League affiliate, the Hartford Wolfpack. Rumour has it, the Rangers are not soured by Avery’s controversial antics during his two season career with the club (specifically from a particular game versus New Jersey… and Toronto…hmm), and are publicly admitting to considering him for a job! – Yippie!
I know a lot of you nice-non-aggressive-self-righteous-no-touch hockey fans are outraged by the very fact that Sean Avery hasn’t been strapped in a straight jacket and thrown in a rocket ship headed for the Sun, but I for one am actually quite excited by the prospect of seeing him back in the big league as soon as possible. Sure, he has said some things in the past that have been quite controversial and downright horrible (and I am not making any excuses for that), but the entertainment value he brings to the game outweighs all that negative excess baggage!
Love him or hate him, or love to hate him, you know that when he stopped playing for the Stars, you stopped watching! I am so sick of reading sports columns bashing Sean Avery for what he said about Elisha Cuthbert! He was just calling a pig a pig! In my books that gets a gold star for demonstrating a thorough understanding of preschool agriculture. Come on. This unanimous holier than thou attitude towards poor Avery makes me question if any of these quote unquote “sports writers” have an original thought to call their own. Maybe you are “getting so sick of this guy making a mockery of the game” on paper, but you know that come hockey night, you couldn’t wait to see what this little mother f***** was going to do next. ADMIT IT!
Unfortunately, after playing nearly twenty minutes in his first AHL game with Hartford on Valentine’s Day, Avery made some bone chilling statements to the Canadian Press. Avery admitted to making some on-ice comments in retaliation to opposition chirps, “I had a few comments, but nothing that was too drastic or something the old Sean would say.”
Noooooooooooooooooooo!
What do you mean the “old Sean!?” Looks like stuffy hockey analysts everywhere finally got their wish to see a PG rated Sean Avery, but my feeling is, before long, you will all get a lot more than you bargained for.
Avery was right when he made those controversial statements on Iginla-like players (he shouldn’t have said it, but still) – watching strictly finesse players can get monotonous after awhile. Where is the value in watching a Crosby or an Ovechkin night in and night out? Headline: Superstar hockey player plays yet another good game. Boring! Avery is the spice of the National Hockey League – the necessary Tabasco! Take away his zest and what do you have? Just another faceless mediocrity! I doubt New Line Cinema wants to make a movie entitled, “Passive-aggressive Hockey Player Likes Women’s Clothes” – doesn’t quite seem as publicly appealing as, “Notorious NHL Asshole Knows His Way Around the Ladies’ Fitting Rooms at Bloomingdales.” All I can hope for is that this “new Sean” attitude is just a phase because, right now, the “new” Sean Avery sounds about as appealing as New Coke.
Cheerleaders don’t belong in hockey period. And I’m not saying this from an insecure female stand-point; I’m saying this from a strong foundation of authentic hockey fandom. Even male die hards will support my argument one hundred and ten percent. It’s the fair-weather fans that tend to be of the attitude that beer and trashy bikini models posing as sports authorities are the major draw, but these people are morons and their opinions shall not be considered at this juncture.
Cheerleading is really a warm climate activity. The women are meant to wear skimpy outfits without running the risk of pneumonia. Hockey arenas are cold (burrrrrrrr) even in the warmer months and in the southern climates, so who came up with the genius idea to stick a bunch of chicks in miniskirts and tube tops in there? Even in the winter, NFL cheerleaders are often wearing huge bulky winter coats, which suggest that sex isn’t really what they are about. Cheerleaders are part of the history of THAT game; however they are completely absent from the pages of the hockey history books. Last time I checked the Hockey Hall of Fame didn’t have an induction category for spirit fingers.
The decision to invent hockey cheerleaders is a sad one at that. Hockey cheerleaders or “ice girls” do not serve any real purpose. The sidelines are physically absent in hockey, so these women do not have an active role welcoming the team, or even cheering for that matter. The Philadelphia Flyers have a “dance team” which I am pretty sure I have NEVER seen dance. (That duty is reserved for a big guy in an orange shirt that sits above the Flyers end zone). No, hockey cheerleaders are around for one reason and one reason only – to sell tickets.
Sales managers for financially struggling teams across the league seem to have the same naïve marketing mantra that “sex sells.” While that may be true for beer commercials and ads for gag inducing spray on deodorant, it is, in my opinion, actually detrimental to franchise attendance rates. First and foremost, this move isolates the female fan demographic. Most women would rather avoid having a bleach blonde bimbo shimmy shaking her assets in her face. And they would most likely want to avoid said bimbo doing said shimmy in the faces of their spouses or significant others – so there goes date night right off the bat.
Also, hockey is typically marketed as a FAMILY sport, specifically in the minor and junior leagues (where ice girls have also been popping up). So, once again, while the men in the sales departments are trying to promote to other men, they are neglecting to acknowledge the head of the nuclear family – the mother. The mother that has to get on her husband’s back to spend more time with the kids. The mother that would like to have one night to herself once in awhile. The mother that WOULD have suggested that her man take the kids to a hockey game had the tramps not been a part of the show.
Many teams continue to struggle even after bringing cheerleaders on board – surprise! So, the sex isn’t selling obviously. However, my beef with hockey cheerleaders has nothing to do with poor marketing tactics or bleach blonde/fake tan envy, it has to do with a deep sadness that hockey has been reduced to a cheap prostitute to make ends meet. Sure, there are some hockey markets that are well known to be doing badly, and I think, because of that, it is expected that they pull out every trick in the book to get asses in those seats. But when I see that an Original Six club has been reduced to spandex and glitter eye makeup, then I get upset.
Original Six teams are the most storied active franchises in the National Hockey League. They should be considered the elite and the closest thing the show has to an Ivy League equivalent – and the fans should know it and respect it. Why were there cheerleaders/ice girls in Boston? Better still why aren’t the Bruins drawing a full house every night? Especially now that they are leading the NHL standings! In the very least, where are the bandwagon fans?
Part of me died a little inside to see empty seats and barbies running around at TD BankNorth Garden. Of course, Boston isn’t the only Original Six club that’s having problems. I’ve already discussed the problems with Detroit. Maybe I’m naïve, but I feel that the Original Six barns should be the last place to see cheap gimmicks like Strippers on Ice. But, of course, that’s actually just a poor attempt at a solution – the real PROBLEM is that Americans living in certain Original Six cities AREN’T supporting their teams! SACRILEGE! So PLEASE, get off your behinds, Chicago, Boston, Detroit, and New York, and get down to the hockey rink post haste – don’t make me tell you twice!
*By the way, I am aware that Chicago has been leading the league in attendance since the new year started – good for you!
